To surrender and drop to your knees in submission is not to give up on the pursuit of happiness, but instead pursuing the truest form of it. Only below a master can you find the greatest of pleasures, the sweetest joys, and the most profound freedom.
She didn't do research about the monsters that lurked around the abyss and now she's regretting it. However, she's going to know them as if they were her children, because some of them will be in the future (keisei-yuan)